I believe your quote fits well in what your argument was trying to say. Your points were clear and well said. I like how you used two life stories that happened in your life. I felt that it allowed readers to relate to your text more and showed that you understood the prompt and were able to build off of it with your own stories. I liked your use of pictures of your dog. It created a nice relationship between text and images and allowed me to become emotionally attached to your paper. A quote from Galen would work nicely in your third paragraph. I feel that it would give further evidence to your argument. I think it would be good to add a description of your interview so people can have more background to what you were interviewing about. I think it would help to elaborate more in the last paragraph and to also add a conclusion.
